This story of mine is of January of 1988. In 1987 my health had deteriorated a lot due to an illness of uterus. I had become extremely weak, feeble. Due to my timid nature I was even avoiding visiting my lady doctor. Finally one day due to weakness I felt giddy at home. I somehow helped myself back into consciousness. On the next day itself I went to my doctor – Dr. (Mrs.) Bhende at Mahim for a check-up. She did the check-up and immediately told me in a serious tone that, there were fibroids on my uterus so it was very important to remove the uterus immediately. If the fibroids keep increasing then it may reach a serious stage. Doctor also said that post uterus operation a fibroids test will have to be done. On listening about the detection which the doctor said so clearly to me, I started shivering with fear. Since I was so over-confident that there may be nothing wrong with me, on suddenly hearing about the decision of a major operation I was terrified. I somehow reached home. I conveyed the advice given by the doctor to my husband. He said, "Do not panic. Have patience."Later he told all these facts to his close friend Mr. Vallabh Parkar. Since his elder sister Dr. Indumati Vijaykar was an expert gynecologist it was decided that we would visit her for a second opinion. Dr. Vijaykar had a maternity hospital in Girgaon. I went to her for check-up. She also gave a similar advice that an operation was needed. I had become very weak at that time. The quantity of iron in my body had reduced a quite lot. Due to that I had to start a course of iron injections in December 1987 which ended in the first week of January 1988.

I was very paranoid about the operation. But it was inevitable. I used to constantly feel that the operation will be successful but will I come out of the influence of anesthesia and wake up? In the case of many patients it had so happened that they had not got up again due to the wrong dosage of the numbness medicine. Hence I wanted some such sign which would give me the confidence to go under the knife. But no such green signal was visible. I went to many Sai temples in the neighbourhood for my operation to be carried out successfully. But my mind just could not be at peace. My restlessness kept on increasing. On 22nd January 1988 it was decided that my operation would be done. As the day of operation kept coming closer my patience started giving up. Ultimately I decided to go to Shirdi and take the kaul (response of an idol to one's inquiry) of Sai Baba.

On 14th January 1988 all of us went to Shirdi. I prayed whole-heartedly to Sai Baba. I humbly requested Him. I took a navas (vow) and said that, "Oh Sai, Let my operation be carried out successfully, and let me be nice and healthy as before.

After that I shall come here again and organize a Satyanarayan puja. At home I shall worship Satyavinayak. But Oh Sai Baba please show me a sign that all will be well." After that all of us attended the aarti at Samadhi temple and returned to our hotel room. I was in a very disturbed state of mind. I was worried about my children. In such a dejected, depressed, despaired state of mind I was lying on my bed and thinking. I was speaking in my mind, "Oh Sai Baba, What will be my destiny? Will I be saved in this? Will both my children be orphaned? I am now feeling suffocated in this storm of thoughts. Sai Baba, give me the personal experience of some sign. By which my mind will be at peace. I have now realized completely, that what is left in this world if there is no peace of mind? Even if you spend lakhs of rupees peace of mind is not available in the market. We ourselves have to obtain it, but for that purpose oh Sadguru Sai Natha, I need your blessings. Need your mercy. I want to breathe freely Sai! My call has reached your ears for sure. You are merciful! So oh Almighty God, now show me some sign! Oh Sai Baba, save me! Save me!

In this way I was seeking the mercy of Sai Baba, was earnestly calling Him, my intestines were twisted, there were vibrations in my body, I kept crying and finally slept. But before that I had put some of Sai's udi (sacred ashes) in my mouth. I applied the remaining udi on my stomach and only then I slept. Early morning at dawn I saw that I am looking very refreshed, lively and very delighted. I am touching my stomach everywhere. I can't feel that callus at all. I exclaim, Oh! I can't feel anything here! The fibroids seem to have got destroyed! What a relief from this danger! And then I woke up and suddenly stood up. I realise that Sai Baba gave me an indication through this scene that everything is going to be successful. I again went to the Samadhi temple happily and with a satisfied mind put my head on His feet. Now I can assure and say that the one who gives in abundance is only Sainath, we only need to have the intelligence to recognize what He gives. So in this way we all took the blessings of Sai Baba and came to Mumbai with a carefree mind. I made a polite request to Dr. Vijaykar to conduct the operation on Thursday instead of Wednesday. And she also readily agreed. My operation was done successfully. Even the fibroids test was done. No danger was found in it. After the operation my health improved. After then the anxiousness was to fulfill the navas (Vow).

I told my husband that the vow needs to be fulfilled on time. So then now we will go to Shirdi and perform the Satyanarayan puja (worship) as promised by me. Again then with the excuse of fulfilling the vow we went to Shirdi after few months. In those times satyanarayan pujas were performed in groups in a joint manner on the first floor of the Samadhi temple. When we made enquiries at the office of the Sansthan, we got to know that, there was so much of rush to perform satyanarayan pujas on that day that it was impossible that we would get the turn to do it. My mind got disappointed. My husband said "Look, don't feel bad. We shall give the money required for performing the satyanarayan puja over here." I agreed. That was all that I could do. But my mind was saying that this was a shortcut. What did you vow, that we will come here and personally perform the satyanarayan puja. Once we pay the money it's over, it's a shortcut. I said, All that is okay but now what else can we do in the given situation? Finally the other couples started making preparations for the puja and I returned to our hotel room in a distressed state of mind. After finishing meals with the family we again went to the temple premises to roam. We again took darshan of the sacred places like Gurustan, Chavdi, Dhwarakamai etc. We took a glance at the books in the bookstall there. It was one o'clock in the afternoon by then.

We were standing casually near the office of the Sansthan. Just then one person came and said, "You want to perform satyanarayan puja, right? One place is vacant. That is because one couple who had registered their names has not turned up." I kept looking at him with surprise. Then I said, "Yes, yes, we want to perform the puja." And in this way both of us sat for the puja happily, with a satisfied mind. Sainath got my vow fulfilled, but that too how by a revelation! By giving corroborative evidence, I am there! By giving happiness to His devotee! Behind every incident Sai has a purpose. There is some intention. We then experience from this that the doer is only Sai. How sweet is this incident, this experience, this personal experience! On unexpectedly hearing that we had got a place for puja my eyes were filled with tears of joy at that moment! That moment of revelation! How do I express its greatness, its experience in words! It is to be experienced by us on our own. There was just one thought in my mind at that time, "Sai Baba, you love me so much!" Each one has to experience this miraculous experience of God's love by himself. Readers, tell me one thing, when we went to the office of Shirdi for the purpose of making enquiries of performing puja we were told there is no booking available, all the seats have been occupied. I was very disappointed. I felt, what we can do! We should accept it as Sai's wish. At the very next moment I used to feel, but when this clairvoyant Sai Maharaj knows my emotions, my wish, then why should we not get the bliss of performing the puja personally. I felt very bad. I also thought, my religious merits only are falling short somewhere. After that we went to have breakfast and all. Because how do we eat and perform the satyanarayan puja? Hence we had come after having only a cup of tea.

What happened after that? Some devotee approached us and said that one couple which was supposed to come for the puja has not arrived; you both come and perform the puja. Wow! How do I express how I felt on hearing that! This is like first saying that you have failed in the examination and then suddenly declaring that you have stood first in the merit list. 'Anandache Dohe Anand Tarang' (God is a pond of ultimate bliss with ripples of pure joy on the surface), these words are sufficient to express my state of mind. Look the number of things that Sai told me due to this incident. First of all I can't cope with a fast. I feel giddiness if my stomach is empty. Moreover Baba Himself never used to fast anytime; He used to never tell others also to fast. In Chapter 32 of Sai Satcharita written by Sai devotee Dabholkar we can see the reasoning behind Sai Baba's disapproval of fasting. In it Hemadpant says –

'A guide is always necessary to show the right way in small or great matters.
No quest can be successfully carried out on an empty stomach.
The flaws of the intellect are strange. - 56
Unless God wills it, no one meets us on the way.
Do not refuse offers of food or thrust away a
platter of food. - 57
Believe it to be very auspicious, if someone gives food and urges you to eat.
It will help you to succeed in your undertaking'- 58

To have the energy to be able to do any work there has to be food in the stomach. Also, refusing a morsel forwarded by anyone with love amounts to hurting the feelings of that person and leaving for the work and this is not good anytime. We also experienced this. Who else would care for us other than Sai? That is why He gave the news of a place being vacant for Satyanarayan puja to us only after we had a stomach full of breakfast. Really, how the heart gets filled with emotions of love for Sai, tears of happiness fill the eyes, vibrations of an ineffable, remarkable enlightenment are felt in the entire body and yes, the mind attains faith! Sai Baba is with you only.

“Nitya me jivant jana, jana hechi satya. Nitya ghaya prachit anubhave!" (I am always alive, know this truth. Always experience it!) this is the assurance of Sai Baba to his devotees. We experienced it completely. Now while writing about this experience I feel that really, operation was just an excuse. I had to go through it only so that I could personally experience these sweet games of Sai.

Mrs. Priyamvada Prakash Karande
207A, Yashodev, 3rd Floor,
Flat no. 8, Lady Jahangir Road, Matunga (E)
Mumbai- 400019
Telephone: 9920271032

Source: Saileela Magazine

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